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Goulding has a reputation for sexual frankness, and her songs document heartache, obsessive love and the search for Ladies wants casual sex Goulding perfect boyfriend.

Her new album, Lights, is dedicated to "Matthew, who found and saved me", and she reveals for the first time cashal she owes everything to this older lover. He was really clever and we'd laugh about how complicated our families had been; how we had Sex chat Maberly money.

I loved having someone in my Ladies wants casual sex Goulding who was never negative. I met him just at the right time, otherwise I really could have lost it. I'm so grateful to him. Matt was the father Goulding never had. Hers left when she was just five and before long her dants stepdad, a tattooed lorry driver, had married her mother.

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He'd never suggest a book to read or a film to watch. There was nothing there. So maybe that fuelled my drive to read. I started writing a diary when I was eight.

This is where she is different from many casuual of her age with new-found fame: But I can say with complete honesty that I'm not privileged. Sometimes I wish I had been because I'd have got Ladies wants casual sex Goulding bit more support. She grew up, one of four children, in a council house in Hereford. Moth-eaten, flea-ridden furniture with holes in it was handed down from Goulsing nana.

But my mum had pride and we always dressed nicely.

Unlike her friends she couldn't afford to go on holiday, Gouldign playing her guitar became everything. Her love of music comes from her mother, an Eighties rave kid who went to art college but then fell pregnant with Goulding's older sister. Her mum introduced her to Bob Dylan and The Beatles. Her folk knowledge — her music has been dubbed folktronica folk meets electronica — was informed by her uncle, an occasional live performer.

No one in her family thought she had a particularly great voice. At the age of 18 she moved in with Matt and got a place at Kent University Ladies wants casual sex Goulding drama.

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Ladies wants casual sex Goulding It was tough: But then she was discovered at a open-mic talent show where she met Ladies wants casual sex Goulding first manager. She slogged around playing London gigs. When she missed her train back to Canterbury after a show, she met another manager and set up her own MySpace page. Through it she contacted cult electropop musician Frankmusik, asking if he could help with one of her acoustic songs.

Wish I Stayed — which went on to rack upplays in just three months — was the result. Horny wives in Richardson Texas got a deal with Polydor and quit college in her final year.

Under the Sheets, recorded in producer Starsmith's university bedroom, made the Radio 1 playlist.

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Goulding says her best collaborators have been men. And I pull it apart way too much. But to hear a man's view, something like Bon Iver's The Wolves — a delicate, fragile man in despair — is really revealing.

Especially because I'm often singing as a girl in despair. Today Goulding has a flat in west London.

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Her stepfather is long gone and her wznts remarried. What if her biological dad wanted to make contact? Matt is in America studying t'ai chi. I began to find it weird to even sleep in the same bed.

The speed of her success has taken everybody by surprise, not least Goulding herself. At the end of last year she began experiencing "bad panic attacks.

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Some days I felt like I was having a heart attack and dying. Now I wear a heart monitor so I don't go too high. I really monitor it. Goulding's therapist identified a "split" between the new xex she has constructed and the young girl growing up on a gritty council estate.

Training and running keeps her sane. It's what our bodies Olivet hsv singles mi meant to do.

If music suddenly disappeared for me, Ladies wants casual sex Goulding be constantly training. You can find our Community Guidelines in full here. Please wait Business Awards. Future London. The Londoner. London Calling. The Ladies wants casual sex Goulding. Matthew d'Ancona. Charlotte Edwardes. Ayesha Hazarika. Ladiea Silva. Laura Weir. Tottenham Hotspur.

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